A great man once said “8 is great!” and here we are in week 8 of the NFL and possibly my most controversial rankings yet! I mean I’m right (hmmmm Patriots), so I don’t know why it’s controversial.
My Week 8 NFL Power Rankings…
749. New York Jets (0-7) – It’s a big tumble for gang green who are now ranked behind 187 8th grade teams in the US.
31. Dallas Cowboys (2-5) – Shockingly bad. That is all.
30. New York Giants (1-6) – Their last 3 games have all been decided by 3 points or less… That would mean they are a competitive team if they weren’t all against NFC East teams…
29. Washington Football Team (2-5) – 2 convincing wins…. Against NFC East teams. So, no, they don’t count.
28. Philadelphia Eagles (2-4-1) – They needed a miracle to beat the G-Men and tied the Bungles… I just can’t…
27. Jacksonville Jaguars (1-6) – This team isn’t good. Doug Marrone can shake it up however he wants. If you shake up a bag of moldy bread guess what you’ve got afterwards? A bag of moldy bread.
26. Minnesota Vikings (1-5) – Kirk Cousins has 11 TD’s and 10 INT”s after only 6 games and that’s with a lot of good players around him. Just imagine him on the Jets!
25. Cincinnati Bengals (1-5-1) – Well done Carlos Dunlap. From worst to first in one tweet.
24. Houston Texans (1-6) – At 1-6 this is the kind of team that has fans salivating over the draft and potential top 5 picks in rounds 1 and 2!!!! Only if they had picks in rounds 1 and 2…
23. Atlanta Falcons (1-6) – How in the hell is a team this bad ranked this high!!!! OMG, are there this many bad teams in the NFL?
22. New England Patriots (2-4) – I would like to rank this team lower but the hoard of zombie squads behind them makes it impossible. People want to make excuses, it’s just not a good team.
21. Denver Broncos (2-4) – I think next week I’m just putting like 21-28 all in one spot just called (The undead).
20. Detroit Lions (3-3) – Don’t we go through this every year? We have a moment where our heads turn cockeyed like a dogs and we wonder, “are the Lions good?” We all know the answer. Lucy isn’t pulling the football this time.
19. LA Chargers (2-4) – Another Charger team that is dropping way too many close games. All 4 losses are by a TD or less.
18. Miami Dolphins (3-3) – A 3-3 team in the playoff mix averaging over 26 points per game changes quarterbacks.
17. Carolina Panthers (3-4) – The Thursday nighter with Atlanta is a must win. They’ve only got 4 winnable games left after hat to get to 8-8 and a shot at the last playoff spot.
16. Las Vegas Raiders (3-3) – There’s a lot of love out there for a team giving up a whopping 32 points per game!
15. San Francisco 49ers (4-3) – They’re next 5 opponents are 24-8, yikes!!!, it would help if they got some bodies back.
14. Chicago Bears (5-2) – Nick Foles just looked bad Monday night. Who’s next? Is Steve Fuller still out there?
13. Cleveland Browns (5-2) – OBJ is out for the season and I’m probably the only one who does not see that as a problem. Less drama, less pacifying and more, God forbid, football.
12. Indianapolis Colts (4-2) – TY Hilton is there only receiver with 20 catches and he’s got 20 on the button. That’s not good enough.
11. Buffalo Bills (5-2) – The Bills record includes not 1, but 2 wins over the Jets. They do not get to play them again.
10. Arizona Cardinals (5-2) – I don’t know how Cliff Kingsbury calls a single play without laughing his tail off about that DeAndre Hopkins trade. (see Texans)
9. New Orleans Saints (4-2) – Alvin Kamara is on pace for 122 receptions for 1,220 yards, oh and about 950 yards rushing.
8. Los Angeles Rams (5-2) – This year all of the defensive coaches Sean McVay knows gets jobs. His crew is filthy, giving up only 17 points per game and Aaron Donald already has 8 sacks.
7. Tennessee Titans (5-1) – 10 of 16 on FG’s.. That’s 62.5% and it’s last in the NFL. Oh and the worst 3rd down defense in the NFL is also a small concern.
6. Baltimore Ravens – (5-1) – 10 TD’s, 5 of them are to Mark Andrews so I guess I know who I’m covering in the red zone.
5. Green Bay Packers (5-1) – McVay, Shannahan and LaFleur can all do one thing really well. Run the ball. Yes, Rodgers is playing well but that offense utilizes multiple backs.
4. Tampa Bay Bucs (5-2) – Brady 5-2 with 18 TD’s and 4 INT’s, Pats 2-4 and picking between Stidham and Cam… Tom wins.
3. Seattle Seahawks (5-1) – Tyler Lockett & DK Metcalf both on pace for over 1300 yards receiving.
2. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-0) – Tale of two halves in Nashville, the first one was just good enough. Roethlisberger threw 3 picks and 2 were just terrible decisions.
1. Kansas City Chiefs (6-1) – It’s not best record, it’s best team and head to head I’m picking this one over everyone.
